| The spiritual path is beautiful, ugly, profound and | | | | strange, negative, dysfunctional, needy, arrogant, |
| ordinary all at once. It comes full of elusive | | | | selfish, 'human' parts of myself and I am NOT |
| aspirations, emotional dramas, transcendent bliss | | | | anywhere near the 100th step. Acknowledging this |
| and everything else in between - and frankly, it | | | | was a HUGE relief. I could stop pretending to be |
| can sometimes feel like living in a terrifying hell, or | | | | perfect and really relax and be me - as I am now. |
| in a pristine heaven, or at other times just simply | | | | A beautiful expression that affected my life was |
| boring and pointless. | | | | 'Whatever you are, however you are, you belong |
| Learning the hard way | | | | to Me'. It almost brings me to tears each time I |
| Looking back at my younger self, I wish I knew | | | | think about it. |
| what I know now. It would have been so | | | | It was in this gentle, accepting place, that I began |
| liberating to be able to give myself a few words | | | | to really move forward on my spiritual journey. |
| of support and guidance on the biggest journey | | | | Before that realization I had what is often termed |
| of my life. At that time, I had no idea what was | | | | 'spiritual ego'. I was under the impression that |
| ahead (although I had outrageous expectations | | | | because I was aware of these wonderful higher |
| and projections, the kind that only come from the | | | | states of consciousness, and other people were |
| fearlessness of a young person). And, like most | | | | not aware of them, that I was actually at a |
| people, I stumbled through life, falling down, | | | | higher state of consciousness than other people. |
| getting up again and learning about life the "hard | | | | Hmmm... Have you ever seen 'spiritual people' |
| way". | | | | doing things so far removed from what they |
| The reason I'm writing this is to share some my | | | | know and teach it's shocking? Have you ever |
| own experiences of over 13 years of spiritual | | | | noticed those wonderful 'ordinary' happy and |
| development and teaching, in the hope that your | | | | amazing beings that don't engage in formal spiritual |
| journey can be as EASY, enjoyable and smooth | | | | practice and yet are so lovable and beautiful? |
| as possible. It would have been wonderful to go | | | | I have come to appreciate that many people who |
| back and meet myself during those years and | | | | have 'no idea about spiritual things' at all, can |
| give myself this article... I wonder how I would | | | | actually have far higher states of consciousness, |
| have responded - or even if I would have | | | | spiritual life and values than many staunch spiritual |
| understood or listened? | | | | aspirants. They just live it - rather than talk about |
| Of course none of us can go back to guide our | | | | it. The spiritual ego is based on form being 'right' |
| younger selves, and I was destined to learn the | | | | or 'better' - not on the soul, the heart, the |
| way I did so I know what I do now. It is my | | | | intention and motivation. |
| heart-felt intention that you may learn from my | | | | Yet again, this humbling realization of where we |
| 'mis-takes' and experiences to enjoy each | | | | are NOW allows us to move on to the third step. |
| moment along your unique journey as you open | | | | We all have this 'spiritual ego' to some degree... let |
| new doors to a more magical existence. I honor | | | | us be aware and release it. |
| and respect you deeply - whoever you are and | | | | STEP 3 - Self Love and Healing |
| wherever you are. | | | | I have found the third step is deeply connected |
| What I am about to share with you is a | | | | to the second step. Step 3 is all about self-love |
| massively condensed version of an epic | | | | and healing. It surprises me how many people on |
| experience of spiritual evolution (one that I am still | | | | a spiritual path hate themselves and seem to |
| in the process of, by the way), and I have done | | | | dedicate very little time to their own healing. |
| my best to highlight some of the main points. This | | | | In many ways, all spiritual work is healing work: |
| is by no means a comprehensive account of the | | | | Think about it. We are healing the soul, the spirit. |
| journey - I hope you enjoy it and take away | | | | In order to heal the soul we need to understand |
| some of the lessons that have been priceless to | | | | what the soul is (the first step), then accept |
| me. | | | | where we are right now (step 2). Finally we can |
| All paths lead to the same place... | | | | have a good look at how wounded we are. Then |
| Having dealt with large numbers of people and | | | | by developing compassion for ourselves we can |
| seen them struggle with some of the same | | | | begin the healing process. Gentle, gentle, gentle. |
| problems in their lives that I have, I have come | | | | Sadly, the vast majority of spiritual paths involve |
| to appreciate that in many, many ways we are all | | | | so much discipline and such high standards that |
| alike. We will experience many of the same things | | | | the healing work doesn't really get much attention. |
| along our journies, no matter where we begin. | | | | Attention often goes to what is wrong, what is |
| This is good news! It means we are NOT alone | | | | not good enough, what needs to be changed. |
| and we can learn from each others' experiences. | | | | Discipline, Discipline, Discipline and all along the |
| If we can accept a few simple truths about | | | | wounded soul just needs gentle, healing |
| ourselves, life, and the limitations of the 'ego', we | | | | compassion. When we are wounded, we need the |
| can make significant spiritual progress in a short | | | | stick to help us move, not to bash us around the |
| amount of time. | | | | head when we fall down! |
| On the other hand, I have seen so many people | | | | For me, simply accepting that I am on the first |
| (including myself) make the journey infinitely more | | | | step and that in order to go to the second step I |
| challenging than is necessary because of not | | | | need to choose to allow the process to be as |
| knowing the process they are likely to go through. | | | | gentle and calm as possible, has enabled a |
| Let's face it, walking blind hurts. Why make things | | | | tremendous amount of healing to occur. Gentle, |
| harder than we need to? Once we know the | | | | gentle, gentle. Sleep well. Relax. My aim was to |
| process, we can relax and enjoy the ride. How | | | | take things easy, relax, move slowly and calmly, |
| does that feel? | | | | understand and learn, take things at my own |
| The simple steps to spiritual growth | | | | pace and be happy with myself as I am. The |
| Despite our similarities, each of us is guaranteed | | | | process of doing less, feeling into things, being |
| to have our own unique experience and journey | | | | subtle and gentle in all ways... baths, extra rest, |
| because we are unique beings. But within this | | | | walks in nature, comfort, taking time to read, |
| variety, I have found there are 5 main steps or | | | | speaking kindly to myself... Ahhh.... Mmm... |
| chapters we are all very likely to encounter | | | | Doesn't that sound lovely? |
| somewhere along the way. By knowing these five | | | | When I have accepted deeply that I am not the |
| steps we will save ourselves a lot of unnecessary | | | | 100th step, I am at the first step -- then I can |
| struggle -- and furthermore, if we can approach | | | | appreciate and love myself for being at the first |
| these steps in the order mentioned here, we are | | | | step and move to the next steps. Little by little, |
| likely to progress rapidly and with more ease. | | | | appreciating each small change, giving credit and |
| Step 0 - The Magic MOMENT! | | | | appreciation for each new progression. Not |
| Before we even begin on our spiritual path (or | | | | expecting anything, just calmly moving ahead. |
| whatever you want to call it) there is usually a | | | | This gentleness takes so much pressure and pain |
| moment where we know deep within 'something | | | | out of the journey, because it is genuine, it is real |
| needs to change'. This is the magic moment | | | | and it is sustainable. Starting from an intense |
| where a calling deep within inspires us to step | | | | 100m sprint, we move away from the race |
| away from our lives as they are today and | | | | mindset and choose to go on a beautiful, soft |
| discover something deeper, something grander, | | | | journey into the misty mountains... enjoying the |
| richer and more magical. At this point, we often | | | | scenes and smelling the flowers along the way. |
| do not know where to look or what to do - but | | | | This sustainable attitude allows the path to unfold |
| the Intention to change drives us forward and | | | | in a graceful and beautiful way rather than in a |
| away from the old into an unknown adventure. | | | | forced and unnatural way. I know so many people |
| The Wake-Up Call: Some people have an accident | | | | who came to a spiritual path, gave up all their |
| or near-death experience where they are very | | | | hobbies, music collection, clothes... only to freak |
| suddenly confronted with a new reality. Others | | | | out years later and get it all back again - and feel |
| have a deep knowing since childhood that | | | | guilty about it. |
| something is wrong with the world and want to | | | | Once we have accepted and learned to love |
| experience what 'once was' or what 'life is meant | | | | ourselves as we are, what we are and where we |
| to be like' - but are not sure how until something | | | | are, then we can move on to the fourth step. |
| happens that turns a feeling into a new way of | | | | STEP 4 - Doing what is Good for the Soul: Gaining |
| living. This silent knowing of a different way of | | | | Power |
| being, long forgotten, becomes activated. Others | | | | In the fourth step we bring our awareness back |
| have a break up, death or illness that inspires | | | | to the enticing first step where we learned about |
| them to search for a new direction; and others | | | | higher states of consciousness and the new ways |
| still are introduced to new awareness by a friend | | | | of being. |
| or family member at the 'right time' - and choose | | | | Having a foundation of gentle growth and |
| to begin the path themselves. | | | | progression, we can calmly and realistically absorb |
| The magical moment signifies the end of the old | | | | more of the spiritual practices and begin to apply |
| and the beginning of the new. The door is just | | | | and experience the meditations, the |
| opening and the choice has been made to go | | | | contemplations and other practices in a real, |
| through and discover what is held on the other | | | | integrated and meaningful way. If we try to |
| side. It is exciting and scary. Do you remember | | | | bypass the previous steps, while we may be |
| your magic moment? Are you ready to go | | | | sitting for meditation, in reality we are just fighting |
| deeper? | | | | with our minds and trying to look good most the |
| STEP 1 - Understanding a New Reality | | | | time. The meditation is not enjoyable or satisfying |
| After making the decision to find out what is on | | | | and empowering. |
| the other side of the door, the first step towards | | | | In the fourth step, meditation is a JOY and brings |
| spiritual growth often involves a thirst for | | | | tremendous nourishment and power. We do it all |
| understanding. This often involves a mental | | | | the time, especially in our private moments - we |
| understanding of a new paradigm. Here we have | | | | have no need for show or force. |
| the 'theory' step. | | | | Having done the previous three steps we are |
| I remember when I had my magical moment | | | | now in a position to start moving up the staircase |
| after retuning from Africa. I felt depressed and | | | | with focus, dedication, and self-love. At this point |
| disillusioned with life and was ready for something | | | | we have gathered our energy, have taken stock |
| new. I wanted to know what was behind the | | | | of where things are and what is really going on. |
| door and became interested in discovering what | | | | This is the place where things can start setting in |
| was going on. It was at this point that I was first | | | | very deeply and significant progress can be made |
| introduced to spiritual concepts and the door was | | | | over weeks, months and years. |
| opened. Imbued with a new thirst for truth and | | | | I've personally tried to do this step without doing |
| delighted with the possibility and hope that this | | | | the other two steps and wasted years in denial |
| knowledge contained, I felt enlightened. As I | | | | and spiritual ego land. |
| learned of the Soul, The Divine, Karma etc. it felt | | | | This part of our journey is where most of our |
| as if I had discovered a whole new world in my | | | | time is spent and, unlike the other steps, I have |
| backyard. I was excited with a new kind of | | | | found in step four meaningful discipline, |
| excitement - a soul excitement I have never | | | | concentration, and determination. These things |
| experienced before. It was yummy! Simply | | | | have been totally critical and have kept me going. |
| becoming aware that there was a different way | | | | If I am feeling tired, I may still take a rest rather |
| of seeing, a new way of being, and advanced | | | | than forcing myself to stay up all night for |
| states of consciousness I had something to aspire | | | | meditation - however, at this stage, regular, |
| to. It was a wonderful high...and kept me hungry | | | | consistent and sustainable practice is essential. |
| for more and more understanding. | | | | In the previous steps, I have learned that force |
| However, along with the mental exhilaration, one | | | | and doing things for the wrong reasons does not |
| of the biggest pitfalls I personally experienced was | | | | lead to successful results. I have also learned that |
| wrongly assuming that knowing was the same as | | | | understanding life holistically, taking care of my |
| being. Knowledge was only the first step on my | | | | body, businesses, relationships and interests allows |
| journey. Unbeknownst to my naive awareness, | | | | the whole system of life to function smoothly. |
| having knowledge didn't mean I had imbibed or | | | | To be sustainably moving forward we have to |
| embodied any of the concepts I had become | | | | account for all aspects of life, not ONLY the |
| aware of intellectually at all! In fact, looking back | | | | spiritual aspect. |
| knowledge at best serves as a map. | | | | Sadly, again, a lot of people somehow ignore |
| Caution: the map is NOT the territory! | | | | every other aspect of their life except the |
| One of my biggest and most severe pitfalls on | | | | spiritual part, and therefore those other aspects |
| the journey was assuming the map is the | | | | end up sabotaging their ability to do their spiritual |
| territory. Just looking at a map, I had no real idea | | | | practice. How many spiritual people do you know |
| what I was going to experience until I got there in | | | | who are broke, ill, or totally out of balance in one |
| person - but unconsciously, I had some strange | | | | or another area of their lives? |
| idea that I was there just because I had seen | | | | Like many things in life, the spiritual path is often |
| where I wanted to go! It's amazing how easy it is | | | | counter-intuitive. Therefore, approaching the path |
| to be in this trap. | | | | from the point of view of a gentle gradual |
| In my case it wasn't until about two years into | | | | upgrade tends to inspire rapid progress. On the |
| my spiritual practice that I realized at last that | | | | other hand, the forced 100m-sprint mentality |
| everything I thought I had attained (intellectually) | | | | tends to lead to burn-out, punctured progress and |
| was all in my head and had neither deeply | | | | hopelessness. |
| reached my heart nor my life. Seeing this clearly | | | | Once we are steady in our progress, once we |
| hurt my 'spiritual ego' but this wisdom and newly | | | | deeply feel we are ascending in our level |
| gained humility combined, allowed me to progress | | | | consciousness, once things have become stable |
| to the second step. | | | | and meaningful, then we are ready for the final |
| STEP 2 - Acceptance | | | | step. |
| Once I recognized that the map is NOT the | | | | STEP 5 - Coming home |
| territory, I moved slowly to acceptance of where | | | | The final step is to abandon the idea that there |
| I actually was, right there and then. | | | | are any steps at all. To recognize that the person |
| Stop for a moment: Do you know where you are | | | | we consider to be on a spiritual journey is not real |
| on your path right now? How do you know? | | | | and giving up the quest for enlightenment |
| In my case, during the first step of | | | | altogether knowing who you are and where you |
| comprehending high ideals and principles, I was led | | | | come from. |
| to appreciate the possibilities life held. The second | | | | This step is by far the most beautiful. I have |
| step in many ways is equivalent to the first | | | | found that as I let go, and find myself in this |
| physical step forward. Acceptance means to truly | | | | beautiful place of constant and endless profound |
| acknowledge in a deeply grounded way where I | | | | peace, everything makes total sense and I realize |
| am right now. If I'm on the very first step, I need | | | | there is no person, no theories and no spiritual |
| to accept I am on the first step. If I'm on the | | | | path, there is just I, the soul, a beautiful being of |
| 10th step I need to accept I'm on the 10th step. | | | | the light witnessing the wonder of life unfolding in |
| If I'm nowhere near the staircase and I don't | | | | its magnificence. |
| even know where I am at all - I need to accept I | | | | At this point in the journey we see the perfection |
| have no idea where I am at all! It's OK. | | | | of each moment and the beauty that was there |
| This again is a humbling process that enables us to | | | | all along. At this point we realize that all |
| make realistic shifts in our practical, grounded in | | | | identification with the body, with the person in the |
| day-to-day life in order to move forward rather | | | | mirror and with all the stories was just part of a |
| than being deluded and hallucinating we are | | | | wonderful game: it was all good and we can see |
| somewhere else. Sadly, just like me, it seems a | | | | life from a place of sweet amusement. |
| lot of spiritual aspirants have common blindness | | | | Wonderful, sweet and benevolent life - I am |
| and lack of acceptance of where they are at | | | | amazed! |
| right now. Why? | | | | Having moved through the steps gracefully, this |
| I feel the reason for this spiritual blindness is | | | | final step is only seconds away and even if we |
| because when we aspire to being on the | | | | continue to chop wood and carry water, we do |
| hundredth step and we have read all about the | | | | so with joy and we are at peace with ourselves |
| final step, it is hard for us to accept that we are | | | | and our world. |
| maybe on the first or second step! It seems so | | | | At last we have come home... |
| far away and we don't like it. We want it to be | | | | Each of us will have our own unique experience of |
| easy - like fast food or turning on a light. | | | | life. I wish you well on your personal wonderful |
| We are impatient beings. Our ego is lazy; our | | | | journey and hope these simple words may inspire |
| spiritual ego is inflated with 'higher than thou' | | | | you on a graceful, loving adventure into new |
| notions. It's hard to accept our weaknesses and | | | | levels of wonder. |
| see things as they are - rather than as WE are - | | | | Please don't try too hard. Learn to love yourself |
| or we would like them to be. | | | | as you are, knowing that you are always a |
| Even if we don't admit it to ourselves, deep down | | | | wonderful, beautiful being no matter what's going |
| we have a knowing about where we are. | | | | on and your home is always a thought away. |
| Because of this subtle knowing, the vast gap | | | | What do you think? Do these steps resonate with |
| between the second step and hundredth step | | | | you? Have you experienced "skipping" steps - |
| often creates psychic, emotional wounds in our | | | | what did you learn? Which step feels the most |
| hearts leaving so many of us in a state of | | | | difficult and why? How do you honor your spiritual |
| depression, unworthiness, anxiety and | | | | practice in balance with other elements of your |
| hopelessness. It hurts to be so far away from | | | | life? I'd love to hear any thoughts or feelings you |
| the goal - and this spiritual despair is the result of | | | | have about your own spiritual path. You are |
| a lack of acceptance of ourselves and the depth | | | | invited to share a comment below. |
| of the spiritual journey. | | | | And as a final note, here is the most powerful |
| The Power of Acceptance: After much denial and | | | | piece I was ever given: |
| fantasy about where I was on my journey, at | | | | "Try to enjoy every part of your journey, no |
| last (after a good beating and humbling process) I | | | | matter if its pain or pleasure, enjoy it ALL. |
| deeply accepted that in fact I do have all kinds of | | | | |